Bilbo Baggins and the Battle of The Morrigan II
Daddy, lets go quickly go vote before the War starts….pleeease…
Preambula
(Editors note and disclaimer: In order to inhale the full sense of the following movie critique, one should have watched Bilbo l, a decent film from the old bookshelf of your parents. But pay attention. Its nothing for a weak stomach. There is a lot a larves and sex, thugs, and mainstream rapism in it. Neither Jeanne de L. nor I, the Narrator, have anything to do with the following contents. We not deprive any living person of their dignity, from an ex ante aspect of their death. We do not endorse acts of revenge against us, neither by the FSB, GRU, SVR, CIA, NSA, Ukrainian, German, English, French, Belarusian, Polish or Colonial Service, nor by any private Contractor. Also Oriental Brethren and sisters with a short temper, who preferrably like to cut in the region of the neck we ask politely, not to be insulted in any way, but to take out the dictionary, and solve misunderstandings after a thourough synoptical analysis. We declare herewith solemnly, that all what is presented here, offsprings the narrations off an Old Beggar, off whom we have lost sight again. The bizarre critique and absolute irrational Review, which you are about to read, has nothing to do with reality and is absolutely farthest from the truth. Calm down, have a tea, and Pax Vobiscum. Who would ever accuse us of making fun of sad and cruel happenings, is kindly asked to look up the versatile literary and poetic form of the Satire. Especially in times of suppression, violence and danger, it was used to utter critique on dead-serious matters in a way, that would exempt the authors from the revenge of authorities. We believe, that this was the motive of the strange beggar. And we want not fail to pay him the respect forhis foolish narrations, and give this panoptic of madness a forum. In fact is the Movie Bilbo and The Morrigan ll, a very harmless movie and will guarantee you a sound sleep. Skal!)
A brand new Bilbo will rock you off your feet… take a seat..
Be it the Netherlands, France or GB. All quickly do elections in order to have a good time afterwards - with a war, forced conscription, and martial-law. Maybe a little bird -flu as a bonus?
What a script!
Sancta Simplicitas! Who believes in Democracy?
In Holland the decoy-winner hands over the power to the Spy Chief, in France LePen miraculously conjures a 28 year old underpants-model as new President (accidentally pro Nato and pro Ukraine), England is anyhow lost, whoever rules, and Germany does since long not even exist as a souvereign nation anymore, but only as a decaying brand name that was bought up by the turkish.
Starring…
The elections as a grand act, before the tragic crescendo of events slowly climaxes…
It is obvious, that certain political forces in the US consider a limited first strike on Russia as a possible option before the next US elections, and then a wash-up of the rest of troublemakers alltogether. And if it is after an election: who cares for the micro-timeline?
As a paper of the CFR pointed out, there are means and efforts from the side of the US, to prevent a Russian retaliation, by - as they pleased to put it analogous- «indirect investments into the Russian Ministry of Defense ».
The relationship of US military channels and the CIA to the 12th GU MO have been very heartily and close, to say the least, since Yeltsin times.
And Mr. Gerasimov has not been replaced so far. So the danger of this mole has not been banned yet for Russia, and he can later reap the fruits.
Oh, i forgot, Shoigu, who possesses a private Army (like his dead rival Prigoshin did), and who was promoted to the head of the Security council. A ticking Bomb could not be defused by Putin so far. Or should i better say: the snake still lies at Putins ageing testo-penic male bosom.
It seems a fact: Putin, who is beyond a deserved pension age, has now to pull himself together like a young hero, in order to fight all the rats around him, and display the same vigilance and verve like in younger years. A Hercules deed.
Oscar goes to…
And the actor Putin doesnt manage to brake out of the script of the CFR: As the screenplay prescribes, he dramatically concludes a military pact with North-Korea. The audience is frantically raging with enthusiasm and Hurrah. The tension rises. All accompanied by the distant cries of slaughtered and tortured palestinians, and the soft rhythm of Houthi missiles, that fly into the sunset. Genius screenwriters have bound together the destiny of Iran, North-Korea and Russia. In one fatal pact. And in the grand-finale, all will luster in an epic and prophetic mushroom-cloud. Tears will be shed by beautiful, yet in-between very body-positive hippos, American presidents will hold poignant-speeches. The leaders of a devastated and ruined Europe will call to solidarity with the dead - even if they are Russians, Iranians and Koreans - and build new detention camps for disinformants and bird-flu deniers. And there in the slimelight! We see him, standing proud! - the Ukrainian hero!! - extending finally the benefits of democratic trafficking also to slender french girls. The moonlight gazes on freshly planted luxury gardens in Gaza., where posh gentlemen dance Kalimba with Skeletons.
Wise and soft…..
Vladimir Putin -our tragic Bond-Like Superstar- plays his role unknowingly, and underpayed on, and, very well indeed: In his age one gets wise and soft. One likes to listen to advisors:
«Vlad, the Ukrainians will attack on 26.02. We know it for sure! We must attack first »
« But Sergey, should we not wait for them to attack? We will have the same trouble like the Germans 1914 with Belgium. »
« You are a lawyer Vlad. We have no chance! They will march to Moscow. FSB prepared all for a coup in Kiev. In two days all will be over »
« Oh Sergey, i am so glad i have you. What do the others say? … Ohhh? All want to attack first? »
« Vlad. And afterwards you can go finally in pension and enjoy the last years.. Hahaha.. we will go hunting and fishing »
Why we We need Bilbo and the Morrigan ll?
The recent screenplay is a jolly good plan that was meticulously scripted, since more than a decade. Good GOD! Who could ever call the Americans and English stupid? They are indeed brilliant! They managed to fell the Soviet Union without one drip off blood, they managed to pillage it, and the Russians were grateful, they even placed a WEF Young-Global-Leader to substitute Yeltsin, once his liver cirrhosis got too smelly.
But then something unexpected happened. The WEF young-global-leader, carefully selected and groomed, suddenly developped an own will and, ……astoundingly even patriotic feelings.
Well! Not too late! What was spoiled by this casting mistake can be made up in the future! This traitor simply needs to die and be again substituted by a sort of Yeltsin.
This time with a less destroyed liver for more longevity.
Do not read this. This is a footnote.
(Recently i was asked, what a Yeltsin is. For the uninformed audience i will complete the narration by the following definition: A Yeltsin has the humour and appearance of a Falstaff, + makes many millions in real estate + is always open to help american and british friends with their poitical needs for a little present. One may ask me how this combination could even become an own type: well, its easily explained: the first part- the real estate stems from the fact that most in Russia are former Serfs. Tolstoy himself described how it was impossible to free them. Now: A Serf observes how the landlord is rich AND has Real Estate. In his Serf brain he creates a junctim between the two traits and ventures for real estate in case he wants to make a money. And as he had observed that the Landlord sometimes stole and murdered, in order to get his possessions, and lied in a never ending go, he will copy it diligently. This is a Yeltsin. And the American and English friends made it possible. There are many famous examples for Yeltsins: For example the complete top of the Russian Ministry of Defense, Shoigu, Tsalikov and so on. They are all Yeltsins. And therefore they also were such good friends with the Americans. Its sounds logical. Not?)
All‘s swell that swells well….
And the box offices will hum with the sound of money, and the way is free for AI, and we fly to Mars, and walk on deserted romantic beaches, because the other ones own nothing and are happy. And slowly they will enjoy the benefits of transhumanism, and tolerate willingly the chip in their head, and the transgender movement will solve over-population and hunger, and we will grow addittional holes for even more sexual pleasures. From all possible directions. To and fro and front and back and up and down. And the Azov-Uzov-Zelenskaya memorial veterans will demonstrate how to satisfy a dead girl through the eye sockets. I think they already showed trailers of this film. And we get more happy and more happy. And the Palestinians will serve as a new-role-model for a completely new understanding of Body Positivity. The Body without flesh. And all will be very mainstream about it and boast about their newest Palestinian which they bought from the Taxidermiste.
Here comes the Spoiler of the Finale… for the premature audience..
There is of course also the devilish bad guy in the plot….sunbank brownish..
The idea to make Russia brake the nuclear ice -thanks to Mr. Karaganov’s tireless ideologic lobbying (coincidentally an affiliate of the US CFR)- is thuggish brilliant and lunatic.
But the Cavalery will arrive.. at Fort Knock-First
US is then free -in concord with Israel- , to eliminate in an alleged chain reaction, Putin, Lebanon, Iran and north Korea in one go, and at the same time buy the historical narrative.
And it will be very smart, because only 5 KT will be used, and it will be very precise, and very on spot Putin. And with him go his loyals, and enough Moscovites to make the other Valadadimir happy… the Godd one.. ahh good one.
But the tragic, which the audience not knows yet, is that the good Valadadimir, lies already in the corner of an abandoned cellar, and took on a very becoming mint-green color that fits his shirt.
Because his friends, that (in secret, shhhh) always thought he smells from his axes..had forsaken him. Very sad. In principle he was always only a luttle poor boy, lonely, that wanted to hear sometimes a praise from his Daddy Joe. So he did everything to please him. From belly dance performances to letting daddy smell.
But back to our tragic hero Putin: shortly before his death, he recognises the traitors, and also the solutions, that had been possible. And just in the moment, where he wants to take the mighty chessboard from the shelf, his wonder weapon - we see him fade in glissing light.
And then - cut cut cut in short succession - we get explained why also Lebanon, Iran, and Korea get nuked. It was Putins own fault: He started the fire. Thats how really grand heroes go.
And interludes an Oldy by Billy Boy + the American Flag Flies.
« We didnt start the Fire »
All what will be remembered by the public, once the smoke has settled, is that Russia used a tactical nuke, and a chain reaction occured.
USA Gratia the Armaggeddon was prevented!
Russia will denuclearise and disintegrate afterwards, thanks to a small civil war and enough moles in place. Nato will pamper this process. Such the plans. Good luck with this hazard game.